The Charmer Monologue - The Father

I Should Have Said It Before

I can’t believe it.  I really can’t.  He outsmarted all of us.  Ever since he was a kid I thought… no… everyone thought that he was the best kid. 

But that is the point is it.

Ever since Zach was a kid, he was overwhelmed with love and good deeds sent in his direction.  He took advantage of all these kind gestures, never appreciating what was being done for him.

I knew there was something up, but I never spoke up.  I never talked to Zach… or to anyone for that matter… about his behavior.  I never said anything. 

Huh… you always think that everything will get better. Not this time.  Things just got worse.

You would never think that a 14 or a 16 year old boy could mess with his fathers’ head.  You would never think that a kid who everyone thought highly of would be so manipulative.

I should have said something.

Then, as he was getting older, I still didn’t say anything.  Even after all the things he did.  All of the lies, the stolen money, the smoking at 13, the liquor at 14, smashing the car after a poker party, and even dumping my entire tool box into the river!

Nothing was said.

Ever.

Well…

Nothing was said until Lizzie… (deep breath)

Nothing was said until Lizzie died.

He was days late.  That son of a—  And he still had the decency to ask for forgiveness.  Oh the nerve of that kid.

And that was the moment.  That was the moment I said something.

That was the moment I gave him the decision.  Stay under my conditions… or go.  Stay and work… or go.  Stay and have a family… or go.

Try to give a truthful apology… say something finally worth something… or go.

I should have said it before.